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handshake

Posted By: Timothy Chow
Date: Sunday, 14 April 2013, at 6:27 p.m.

In Response To: handshake (Phil Simborg)

Phil Simborg wrote:

If someone says, "TY" or "good match" after every match, does it have any meaning at all? I think it means nothing.

Perhaps, but if everyone but you says TY after every match, does it mean anything that you don't?

I'm not saying that one should or should not say TY after an online match; never having played a match online, I have no sense for the etiquette. However, I don't think you can use pure logic to conclude that some particular action does or doesn't mean anything. Etiquette can't be derived by austere logical reasoning from some set of axiomatic first principles. It's governed by the actual behavior of a community. The majority of what we call "polite behavior" makes no logical sense. But logical or not, other people have certain expectations, and while we're free to react to those expectations however we like, we have very limited control over other people's behavior.

I don't see Donby as trying to force others to act in a certain way; he's pointing out the existence of certain expectations among a sizable segment of the BG community, and suggesting that people who were not aware of those expectations might want to adjust their behavior in light of this information.

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