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How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.

Posted By: Albert Steg
Date: Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 12:49 p.m.

In Response To: How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off. (Grant Hoffman)

In addition to the good suggestion already made . . .

I think it's almost always a good approach for your first move to be a genuine, non-accusatory expression of your annoyance to the person, politely pointing out something along the lines of "I don't mean to be unfriendly, but I find your "X Y and Z" makes it hard to focus on the game. Please stop." Incredible as it may seem, it's *just* possible that the person is oblivious to the effect he's having. (Though that doesn't seem likely in this case). Even if you don't expect this to bear fruit, if he continues the behavior he is now explicitly doing something he knows is distracting to his opponent (because you told him so) -- and that makes an approach to the TD a logical next step. This makes it harder for him to 'muddy the water'.

The other approach I would tend to take is deciding I'm not going to deal with it over the table at all (because this kind of conflict may be just what he's looking for), and try to apply a sort of zen-like acceptance that the noise is part of the environment and has nothing to the game and just placidly tune it out and acknowledge it not at all. The opponent becomes very small and distant. while the checkers / field get bigger. This is *not* what he's hoping for -- and if you are able to just let it pass by without reacting, it can become more of n effort and burden for him than for you. I find I'm able to do this with some people better than others, and on certain days better than others. Headphones probably good at this point.

If I took this latter approach, and won, I would offer some 'constructive criticism' to him that his behavior was very distracting, and others likely find it so -- in the friendly spirit of helping him avoid becoming a pariah. (If you lost, it just sounds like whining).

Albert

Messages In This Thread

• How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
  Grant Hoffman -- Wednesday, 26 April 2017, at 11:33 p.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    Art Grater -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 4:27 a.m.
    • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
      Casper Van der Tak -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 8:32 a.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    Phil Simborg -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 10:13 a.m.
  • One more idea
    Phil Simborg -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 10:16 a.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    Albert Steg -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 12:49 p.m.
    • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
      Casper Van der Tak -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 4:06 p.m.
      • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
        Fatboy -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 6:09 p.m.
    • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
      Art Grater -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 5:46 p.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    vidvis -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 6:35 p.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    Stick -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 7:40 p.m.
    • Well Said NM *NM*
      Fatboy -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 8:32 p.m.
  • How do you deal with a Player who does these 3 things to put you off.
    Grant Hoffman -- Thursday, 27 April 2017, at 11:16 p.m.